Fix It!
Today, I went to see Tyler Perry‘s Why Did I Get Married Too? with my parents and younger sister. I did not expect much from the movie, but I had seen the first movie and enjoyed it well enough. I was interested in seeing how some of the issues from the first film were resolved, but I initially intended on waiting for DVD. But, hey, they paid…
Well, as I expected, Why Did I Get Married Too? was not as good as the first movie, but there were still a few things that made viewing it a worthy effort.
*****spoiler alert*****
First, or I should probably say last, there was Dwayne Johnson. Gotta love The Rock, even if it was just for a second. I had to get that out of the way.
Secondly, there was Janet Jackson performing the song “Nothing” over the end credits. This song reminds me of “Again” Janet, which is the best Janet to have.
Lastly, was the scene in the hospital, the one that probably irritates people who label Tyler Perry as preachy. I am referring to the “fix it” scene where Patricia (Janet Jackson) literally pushes the other characters towards their spouses repeatedly saying “fix it.” This scene may seem contrived and preachy, but the idea of this scene has probably been the single most lingering truth that I have wanted to impart to others in my life since I became single again.
It is so much easier to see what other people are doing wrong now than it was for me to see the wrong in my own marriage. That is just the way it works. I found myself shaking my head over and over again during the movie and things that may not have been obvious to others that were clear mistakes to me.
I am also in the process of of reading Tia McCollors‘ A Heart of Devotion, and I keep shaking my head during that. The characters are supposed to be Christians, but they still go through the same hardships that all other couples and people suffer through unnecessarily.
Additionally, in everyday life, in all the couples around me, I see the same things. It tears at my heart. All that I can think walking through this world with what I know now is “fix it.” I have talked directly with some people that saw me go through my divorce. You would think that seeing that happen would drive them to put in some extra effort. Instead, I see couples going down the same road as my marriage or an even bumpier road.
Recently, my brother-in-law preached at a local church about marriage. All in attendance could tell that it touched so many hearts because of the responses from couples, but how often does one see such responses one week and then the same old destructive behavior the next?
Another issue that comes up with all this is that some people want to fix it, but have no idea how to do so. This should never be an issue for Christian couples. Just as with other aspects of life, God has to come first. Just showing up at church is not enough. We all need a personal relationship with God. You can only get that by studying the word for yourself, prayer, and meditation. Putting God first should make you think about what you do and say before doing and saying it. You will still make mistakes, there will still be arguments, and there will still be strife. However, you should be able to fix issues and learn from your mistakes if your heart is in the right place. It takes effort from both parties, as well. One person cannot make a marriage or any other relationship.
I do not have the answers, but I think that my brother-in-law made some good points for Christian couples to consider. Here is “God’s Love Bank” from Clyde D. Mayberry from April 11, 2010 while guest speaking at Wyoming Avenue Church of Christ:
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In this sermon, Clyde gives insight to those who are at two different levels, especially different spiritual levels, in relationships. Perhaps this will get some people started on the road to fixing it.
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