“Relative”ly Speaking
So, my extended family had a celebratory event for an elderly relative of mine this weekend. They try to have something for him every year; however, this year, this person is pretty sickly, and the family is thinking that this may be the last one for him.
So, my brother asked if I wanted to ride with him to this event, and, although it was last minute, and I already had other plans, I honestly just did not want to go.
My thoughts on the matter are, I do not really know this person and they do not really know me. Nor do I know most of the other people, mainly his children and their offspring, that were going to be at the event. At this point, this relative does not even always recognize people, so I figured I would be the last person that they would recognize. I could just see myself sitting there basically looking stupid because, in all honesty, I just do not have a relationship with these people. I am just being real.
So, imagine my feeling of sheer guilt when my sister, who at least has a relationship with a few of the offspring because they are closer to her in age, sent me a text message saying that the elderly relative thought that she was me?!
That guilt was very short lived, though. I chalked it up to him just knowing the name (and not really me) since, I don’t know, it was his sister’s name after all.
To further justify my actions, when this relative’s first wife died years ago, I had nightmares about her and the last state that I saw her in for years. Really. From that and other experiences, like working in a nursing home while I was in college, I have concluded that I just cannot deal with the sickly and dying. I do not do hospitals, I do not do funerals, and I try my best not to do those events where they think it will be the last.
I’m like Jay-Z. I do not want that sickly image, or worse, dead image of them to be my last memory of them. I do not need any more nightmares.
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